Apparent pain and heartache within your relationship is an evolutionary opportunity. You are most likely a lovely, empathic, well skilled and bright soul. Have faith in your inherent intelligence, skills and aptitudes, natural joys, exuberance and elation. Life is made perfect in you . A complete and contained wholeness, forgotten, is who and what you are.
As I have expressed many time, any and all dissonance and anxiety are golden nuggets to attune to and resolve our core ‘wound’ dissociation, revealed in blame, labels, and judgements of self and others. They arise from core impressions of perceived inadequacy, insufficiency , un-loveability, when being ignored and unseen in early development, when an impressionable and deeply sensory awareness were not sufficiently held and satiated in unconditional love, belonging and acceptance. A clear lack of ‘essential satiated nurture’ to evolve and mature into natural rest, a necessity as to accept and embrace you inherent wholeness.
Both you and your partner have a rich opportunity to become attuned and responsive to each other by holding space for the various streams of dissonance that is surfacing in your relationship by delaying meaning making, analysis, and blame. It is safe to feel and share this pain emerging without creating a story about what it may or may not be. To create a shared agreed context without jumping to fill it with content.
The thinking and feeling mechanism often disrupts this process as the fixated self (ego), visible in the monkey mind, has no confidence or presence to attune to the embodied wisdom right beneath its very surface.
As you may attune; to grown and mature into our own empowerment and richness of simple, direct and clear responsive adulthood requires a daily courage to recognize that reality is not working against us.
Your perceived current relationship difficulty is a positive constructive feedback from the whole ‘shared’ psychosomatic organism, rather than as pathology.
Any and all “neurosis” are “golden nuggets”, a clear invitation, to become responsive to occurring developmental stress and to attune to natural rest, whilst we release our thinking and feeling defensiveness, busyness, and emotional programming for better realignment, integration and maturation.
As your awareness expand to include the totality of who and what you are, you can attune to the challenges of life with greater insight, as you safely recognize them to be the golden nuggets to move into greater depth, clarity and joy.
At the depth of your being is reservoir of limitless potential in connection to the whole of life. Continue to harmonize to your own natural rest, to reclaim, restitute and restore your inner template of wholeness, dignity, and value for greater self acceptance.