“PhuturePrimitive” by Simon Haiduk

Rarely does an animal need to confer with a concept of self before it expresses, acts and engages! Humans, however,  edits  who they are for effect to fit and position themselves in a created story of self and others.

When the constructs that enforces identity is seen by the seeker (the habituated thinking and feeling machinery and value perspectives) the many layers of conventional ways of being are gradually dropped in attunement to Nature, as in a responsive engagement to life arising.

In this clear, free and aware space something raw, real and intimately engaging appear, a receptive dialectic dance between polarities arise.

Here life has no preference, it simply appear and expresses itself  as unique subtleties in intimate engagement. It becomes deeply responsive to life in self and seeming other.  Unafraid, it just is what it is, as no doubt obscures action, or lack there off.

Life as in looking and searching for meaning ceases, as it is no longer living in a dominant identity, with a preference for a specific outcome, that is separate or preoccupied with a perception of self or other.

It is no longer concerned with positioning itself for effect as it has no fixed self it identifies with.  It is neither concerned with evaluating, qualifying, measuring itself or other. The mechanism of thinking and feeling in the body/ mind connection is no longer an obstacle, as it no longer reside or rest in ideas of a (fixed or fluid) self.

Life is simply Logos in thesis, antithesis and synthesis. You become intimately responsive, as you are face to face with what life is, ‘complete as you and as other.’ All need to create or identify a story of self or others vanish, as no opposite is identified.

Nature become obvious when life finally receives itself in form.

Panta rhei, “everything flows”

The interpretation of Logos understood by Heraclitus is as an applied term for a principle of order as an understanding of a Divine animating principle pervading the Universe. To Heraclitus all things come to pass in accordance with Logos and that Logos is common.

Heraclitus is famous for his insistence on the ever-present change in the universe, as stated in the famous saying, “No man ever steps in the same river twice”. He believed in the unity of opposites, stating that “the path up and down are one and the same”, all existing entities being characterized by pairs of contrary properties. His cryptic utterance that “all entities come to be in accordance with this Logos” – “the account which governs everything,”

This Logos remain but humans always prove unable to understand it, both before hearing it and when they have first heard it. For though all things come to be in accordance with this Logos, humans are like “the inexperienced” when they experience, as they fail to notice the space (Fire of Origin) which  life flow from, which they do when awake, just as they forget what they do while asleep.

A Dialectic Unity

Logos to Heraclitus was never rational… it was and remain dialectical!   The Logos Heraclitus refers to is rarely recognized and realized.  When this Logos is fully integrated nothing is rejected! All is received! Logos is seen everywhere! All previous mental maps of reality are dropped as they are seen as an incomplete reflection of the animating principle that is pervading all.

This Logos he refers to is most clearly seen when you allow silence to pervade you, and you live fully engaged in the river of life as you meet and receive the seemingly opposite on the level of being. Logos fully embodied and integrated into form becomes a united totality, a vertical expansion as union & mystery!

What fuels the “Blind-spot’ to Logos is the ideas, values, maps and beliefs that have been imprinted and programmed into us. We are a species impressionable and susceptible to conditioning. From the moment we are born, we disassociate from our birthright. We are lions that have become sheep,  as we have been conditioned to think and feel we need and must become something ‘extraordinary’ to prove our “birthright” perceived inherent value. In the process we do not recognize the beauty of what is common, ordinary and inherent to us all.

The perceived need to accumulate an identity to be set apart from others is an oxymoron hiding in plain sight.   We are conditioned to pursue specialness and privileges, and we substitute our birthright as ‘one unified wholeness’ to external measures, evaluation and approval.

We abdicate our fire of origin to live by a conceptual understanding of reality, rather than surrendering to the flow as it.  Through our seeking for identity, as we attempt to prove our adequacy and sufficiency, an already given, we subsequently become a cog in a systemic machine.

We have individually and collectively abdicated our direct and intimate ‘free, clear and aware’ connection to our fire of origin. We have substituted our birthright for a conceptual understanding of justice as attunement and alignment. We have Logos for a conceptual map ‘disconnected from the attuned and always aligned unified fire of Origin.  Individually and collectively we have replaced it with a conceptual system of ideas of self and others, living disconnected in a conceptual self and submitted to collective policing, abandoning and abdicating our opportunity to be in connection with our fire of Origin.

Most humans are never able to see this. The perceived ‘idea of being a separate self’ ID is an oxymoron of imprinted values informing mental and emotional maps of self; an idea of a separate ‘self’ that is hiding in plane sight.

Humanity is driven by a never ending thirst to satisfy an idea of themselves that require that they feed into proving themselves, that they are enough i.e.; adequate, sufficient, loveable, worthy, seen etc..

We individually and collectively dialogue about sustainable and efficient practices, but how can we ever connect the dots to Logos as long as we abdicate and deny the connection to the obvious in ourselves.

Life simply evolves in and through form, there is nothing personal about it at all…and thinking and feeling it is, is simply paralyzing real ‘conscious ‘engagement with the unified Logos at our core, a clear fire of Origin in thesis, antithesis, synthesis.

Life is simply most beautiful when we meet face to face in the ordinary as we receive our birthright. You never have lived until you realize your connection to your fire of Origin, as “Pure-empty–Being” a paradox you are,   “a unified  thunderbolt that steers the course of all things’ whether you know it or not!

OM

The process of releasing conditioned impressions…alienates U from conventional views. U rediscover the world as the unseen potential.

As I know you are alone through this…in an entrapment of identity… I first hand know it’s challenge…Rest assured the fire inside you knows the way…and knows what you need before the surface structures of the identity does. U did say the red pill.

• Creation happens in the gross, subtle, causal and non -dual…
• U R the new event horizon…the birth of a new Universe….a holographic torus….  IN A FREEFALL …….
• Source origin…. keeps expanding..teaching itself from the inside out….

To wake up to what IS makes U tremble from the inside out…. it is freakier and more wondrous…than anticipated.

• It is only through ‘resting as awareness’ U can discover “source being” as it is….. “U” in a process of undoing…perceptions.  The constructs of the thinking and feeling mind is seen through…as wholeness is self revealing…. in creation!

• THIS IS A ‘SEEING’ that is gifted from wholeness..not a conceptual understanding from the thinking / feeling identity…..as seeking gets U nowhere, as the seeker is seeking him/herself…..  This is discovered .when…. uncoiled….and released from identity.

A teacher cannot give you the truth.
The truth is already in you.
You only need to open yourself
– body, mind and heart
– so that his or her teachings will penetrate your own seeds
of understanding and enlightenment.
If you let the words enter you,
the soil and the seeds will do the rest of the work.
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

TO CLARIFY MY TERMINOLOGY AS TO MEANING: ‘Excerpts below are taken from WIKI and Youtube.’

EVENT HORIZON:  In layman’s terms it is defined as “the point of no return” i.e. the point at which the gravitational pull becomes so great as to make escape impossible.

HOLOGRAPHIC TORUS VIDEO:

FREEFALL:In Newtonian physics, free fall is any motion of a body where its weight is the only force acting upon it. In the context of General Relativity where gravitation is reduced to a space-time curvature, a body in free fall has no force acting on it and it moves along a geodesic.

CHAKRA:Chakras, according to the Himalayan Bönpo tradition, influence the quality of experience, because movement of energy cannot be separated from experience. Each of the six major chakras are linked to qualities of our existence.
Any result of energetic imbalance among the chakras is an almost continuous feeling of dissatisfaction.

IE:When the heart chakra is agitated, people lose touch with feelings and sensations, and that breeds the sense of dissatisfaction. That leads to looking outside for fulfilment. When people live in their heads, feelings are secondary; they are interpretations of mental images that are fed back to the individual. When awareness is focused on memories of past experiences and mental verbalisations, the energy flow to the head chakra increases and the energy flow to the heart chakra lessens. Without nurturing feelings of the heart a subtle form of anxiety arises which results in the self reaching out for experience. When the throat chakra settles and energy is distributed evenly between the head and the heart chakras, one is able to truly contact one’s senses and touch real feelings.

In conclusion: Each energetic center has to be fully released and open (integrated) for our being to be clear, free and aware and CONSCIOUS in CREATION.

I am starting a monthly Sangha in Vancouver with a maximum capacity of-15 (space limitation) . I will go through the core ‘self revealing’ teaching, to uncoil, deepen and expand UR immersion into ‘wholeness.’ Details are on this web site under consultation.

RED PILL

Relax into being!

There so much depth and beauty to your being, much more than you realize. You have been taught and conditioned to live on the surface structures of what you think and feel you are, but there is so much more to you than meets the eye. You are a universe complete and whole unto yourself. Your source origin, is alive and well, and you have simply forgotten your infinite and boundless nature.

We are often resistant to taking a look at areas of our lives, that seem broken, yet often these areas have the most potential for payback and reward. Our day to day life can be received in its entirety when our immediate responses are recognized as a window of opportunity. The subtle contractions and expansions are the opportunity, an intimate ripeness, that puts you in direct contact with your core disassociation for core alignment. You can relax your identity labels and open up to life, without clinging and resisting to an outcome, allowing reality to unfold without interference.

As your awareness expands to include the totality of who and what you are, you begin to recognize what was always here. You attune to the challenges of life with greater insight, as you recognize them to be the golden nuggets to move into greater depth, clarity and joy. You will discover your being as a reservoir of limitless potential in connection to the whole of life.

You are the divine mystery, source origin, awakening into ‘Consciousplay’ in form.

The very source of your existence is a unified field of connections. This reality is rarely seen, as the source origin, in form, ‘the character, has identified ‘itself’ by everything that has been given by others, such as name and assumed identity, inclusive of a conceptual knowledge of space and time, as a past, present and future.

The character has becomes an armour that edits reality for preference as it is arising. The character, resists, reacts, and rejects, what is arising, in itself, and projects the content onto others. The character abdicates the immediate responsiveness to Source Origin as itself.

When this is understood, surrendered and integrated, a real spontaneity and an open receptive ‘being’ become visible. An innocence re-emerges that comes from a deep experience of life itself, informed by gratitude, tenderness, and compassion to the ever present miracle seen in your other. ♥

Play becomes U!

We are ‘most often than not’ resistant to life as it is,  in out individual uniqueness. The mental and emotional mind, visible in our disorientation and confusion, will always be seeking for meaning and analyzing life apart.  We abdicate and negate our own lives when we are not effectively responsive to  our own inherent dissonance arising. The dissonance is the golden nugget, the opportunity, to genuinely receive and accept life in us emerging.

In the movie KARMAGEDDON I deeply appreciated Jeff’s and Bhagavan Das’s transparency and openness as they expose themselves to endure our collective inquiry. The film beautifully tells their unique stories and we become their captive audience.  In Karmageddon, the seeker in all of us is shocked, as there is nothing to hide and nowhere to hide it.

In the film their teacher /student pathos and polarity become apparent.     The enmeshment of the egoic constructs in both Jeff and Bhagavan Das becomes clearly visible.  Their pathos of mutual neediness invested in the other is apparent and a gift for all of us to see. As an audience, Karmageddon, is a sweet offering to examine our own need for belonging and specialness. The convoluted stickiness in their relationship is a clear indicator to where they have both abdicated the responsiveness to attune to the apparent dissonance in their own lives.

Bhagavan Das is uncannily direct and open with his intentions.  He is simply stating life as it is in him, and what is broken and un-integrated in him becomes evident.  It is shocking to observe his justification for his usury behavior, and it is appalling to observe the lack of accountability for his actions.   Nonetheless, I sincerely appreciate the journey of the soul, evidently disoriented and confused, observable in him.

Karmageedon is surely a collective vehicle to examine the smorgesboard of ideas concepts, beliefs and preferences we may have individually and collectively about spiritual realities and actual reality.   Bhagavan Das is so apparently a seeker negating to examine his own urges, impulses and desires.  He is statically enamored and entrenched with the seductive story of Kali, and is transfixed by the accompanied spiritual practices. This is a very genuine reflection of the perils and difficulty of the spiritual inquiry.  It is so easy to become fixated and entrained by spiritual myths and metaphors’, as the mind and emotions are ‘spellbound’ analyzing the stories for meaning and applicability.

Our conventional reality is also hypercritical and inflexible as it questions the value of such a rigorous spiritual inquest.  Cultural values that are traditionally informed are holly relics.   Our societies have become inherently self policing and deep spiritual inquiries have little merit in the modern world.

The many conventional impressions that inform the thinking and feeling constructs have entrained us to assume that our lives are personal.  It is simply not so. It is much bigger than that.    The assumptions we make that this is a personal journey informs an enclosed system of limited perspectives, where the inherent and competitive need for specialness and rightness becomes obvious.

The detectable need for specialness in Bhagavan Das is no different than in most of us.  It just becomes more potent in his unique expression exposed on the big screen. The need for specialness is ‘symptomatic’ for the prevalent collective cancer of invalidation. None of us are immune to it, as it is transfixed and woven into the fabric of our society. We have not collectively understood how to sustainably attune to our individual distinctiveness, to self-correct and surrender,  to genuinely embrace, accept and nurture our uniqueness and differences.

It is easy to be critical of Bhagavan Das, nonetheless,  it is laughable to assume ourselves equipped to assess his pond of supposedly superficial mush, within the difficult context of understanding our own biases and our own self negation. We basically disassociate from our own origin when we avoid our individual dissonance, pain and suffering.

It is plainly impossible to make assumptions informed with clarity, if we are not able to see our own profound biases right up and down the whole process, and especially if we can not recognize we are writing from within the dream itself.

Every human being is steeped in interior complexity through socialization and conditioning that creates universes all until themselves.  To assume any definitive knowing of another, when it is difficult enough to discern our own biases, is the epitome of delusion. 

If we have any intelligence at all, it will become visible through our tenderness to life, as we may choose to love Bhagavan Das and ourselves, in our shared mire and brokenness. Often, we abdicate and negate the responsiveness to life in us through the teacher.  It is much easier to become transfixed by a great oratory overture, that to buckle down and get real with our own shit.   The teacher and our cherished ideals are ‘most often’ the very blankets we insert between ourselves and reality.

We must examine our own blankets, the infinite impressions visible in our treasured concepts and beliefs, if we are so inspired to uncoil our own false misconceptions about reality.  Maybe then can we uncoil our personal and collective wounds, the layers and layers of mental and emotional misconceptions, and finally come home to what has always been.

Life is love, you and I, in form dancing.  Life, here, simply doing the best it knows how, often perceived with flaws by the other, but does it really matter?  Making assumptions about life in the other is the cosmic joke. None of us are perfect beings. We are one being playing, here-now, in infinite forms, maybe we will come to understand more of the mystery and develop tenderness for ourselves in the other.  Maybe, then, will we start to ascend individually and collectively with our feet on the ground.  May we all journey from complexity to simplicity, presencing into the edges of our personal dissonance, embracing our innate wholeness, a genuine acceptance of life as it is in us.

We are the mystery! OM MANI PADME HUM!

“Any teachings of enlightenment or self-realization as a onetime event or a lasting and permanent state or experience is an erroneous concept.  Yesterday’s realization is not a bit of good – it is dead, it has lost its vitality. It is useless to try and cling to or hold onto an insight, understanding, or realization, for only in its movement can ever-fresh and new insights of truth or reality appear. “ Sailor Bob Adamson

This documentary makes for an interesting dialogue as an integrated awakening is rare occurrence indeed.  Karmageddon makes the pitfalls of the spiritual journey in search of enlightenment visible.

Reality is a shock when you get real with it. There is nothing for you and I to hold onto. We break in every which way to all ideals, beliefs and concepts in search of what this is. This becomes intensely apparent in Jeff’s journey in the movie Karmageddon.

Many gurus and pundits claim they stand free, clear and aware of all conditioning.  Nonetheless, most that make this claim is rarely integrated!  Is it truly a possibility to stand free, clear and aware of the many gross, subtle and causal lines and levels in the Pandora’s box of the subconscious?   And is our subconscious personal, or is it possibly ‘the noosephere’ the impersonal network made personal by the adaptation of the ego.

A teacher may have a cognitive understanding concerning the Cretan maze of mental, emotional and instinctual constructs, nonetheless this understanding of the mechanism of the body/ mind connection does not equate to that an integrated awareness is operational in the teacher!  A rational seeing of mental, emotional and instinctual conditioning and programming are not synonymous with awakening, but many teachers ‘think/ feel’ it is!!

What can be helpful in simplifying this complexity is the AQAL integral map and spiral dynamics map, as long as the user refers to these as a maps, as they are maps and not the territory.

Life is truly a journey of uncertainties. You and I have a simple opportunity, to pause and presence, and a chance to observe life as it is, without needing to immediately inform meaning to what is arising. We can choose to presence into the possibility together.

This article is followed by KARMAGEDDON, Part 2,  Pathos & Polarity:

The Need for Belonging, Specialness & Adoration

DISSONANCE

That is the beauty of being with the dissonance…it takes U right to the edge of your own misconceptions as they become visible through the mental and emotional meaning making …so the programmed filters can be seen and disqualified.  It allows for the spaciousness within to expand by simply noticing these edges of the habituated constructs that keeps us bound. It is a continuous journey to simply receive and accept all of oneself ‘genuinely’…. and open up to the larger system of hidden harmony and connectivity previously unseen.

Freedom only comes by being in contact with the dissonance, be it emotional, financial, sexual, social etc. It is fuckin painful and at times feels unbearable..and God knows I have wanted to check out of facing these edges…, nonetheless…this is when the mental and emotional programming in seeking for meaning and solution is clearly seen. It is only by awareness itself ‘seeing this process  that the clarity ultimately uncoils the misconceptions at our own core, as these misconceptions are fed by emotional habituated patterns and sensations in the body mind.

Natasha English

HEARTFELT IMMERSION

I am not interested in enlightenment if it means detachment from the emotional body, the earth plane, the challenges of being human. I am not interested in ‘non-duality’ if my personal identifications, healthy ego and body temple are removed from the non-dual field. I am not interested in self-avoidance masquerading as enlightenment. I AM interested in enrealment, because it means that my most spiritual moments are inclusive, arising right in the heart of a heartfelt immersion in all that is human: agony & ecstasy, laundry list & unity consciousness, earth & sky, joy & sorrow, fresh mangoes & stale bread. Its all God, even the dust that falls off my awakening heart.

Jeff Brown

Love Entwined and Visible

Loving U is easy,U R like breath,
effortless here in this heart,
a love not asking for a reason to love,
but in love….and at home
with the mystery.

A heart longing and loving for itself in the other,
for tenderness,
the clearest whisper in this dream!